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December 99 Jokes of the Week

Week 3

Deng went to US and had a meeting with Bill Clinton.
Bill: I want to show you the US advancement. Come with me.
He took him to a forest.Bill: Dig the ground. Deng did it.
Bill: more..more..more... Deng went upto 100 feet.
Bill: So now, try to search for somethingDeng: I got a wire.
Bill: You know, it shows that even 100 years ago we used to
have telephones.Deng became frustrated. He invited Bill to China. The
following year, Bill was in China.
Deng: I want to show you our advancement. In a similar
manner, he takes Bill to a forest.Deng: Dig it. Bill does.
Deng: more..more..more...Bill goes upto almost 400 feet.
Deng: Try to find something. Bill tries.Deng: Did you get anything?
Bill: No, there is nothing here.
Deng: You know, it shows that even 400 years ago we used to have WIRELESS.

Week 4

A sixty year old man went to a doctor for a check-up. The doctor told him, "You're in terrific shape. There's nothing wrong with you. In fact, you might live forever; you have the body of a thirty-five year old. By the way, how old was your father when he died?"

The man responded, "Did I say he was dead?"

The doctor was surprised and asked, "How old is he, and is he very active?"

The man responded, "Well, he's eighty-two years old, and he still goes skiing three times a year and surfing three times a week during the summer."

The doctor couldn't believe it! "Well, how old was your grandfather when he died?"

The man responded again, "Did I say he was dead?"

The doctor was astonished! You mean to tell me that you're sixty years old, and both your father and your grandfather are still alive? Is your grandfather very active?"

The man responded, "He goes skiing at least once a year and surfing once a week during the summer. Not only that, but my grandfather is 106 years old, and next week he's getting married again."

The doctor said, "At 106 years, why the heck would your grandfather want to get married?"

The man responded, "Did I say he wanted to?"

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